Diary of a busy day

Dear Diary, talk about a busy Tuesday…

8 am: Dazzletime!

This is my 'Brush with genius' look.


10.40 am: And I wrote this one for Schubert

Heh heh heh. You said pianist.


12.00: Star Trekkin’ across the Carpet of Doom

He's purple and his friends look weird. Beam me the heck outta here Scotty!


2 pm: Afternoon literature catchup

This guy reminds me of something... It'll come to me.

5 pm: There’s only one word springs to mind, Mrs Hubbard.

7 pm: Bare!


The unadulterated joy of the photo op

What what now? Camera? Oh goodie!

Don’t you worry, Daddio. I won’t make this face.

Let me just get settled here…

Nyah hah hah!

Whassat? Oh, I thought you said you DID want it sticking out!

Are we there ye- Oh hang on…

I just have to do this, erm, thing that- no don’t you dare! I look HUGE in these…

I just remembered I left the keys in the, erm, microwave…

And the, erm, bathtub is overflowing with the, uh, parking meter thing… running out…


A Dishwasher Service Engineer calls

‘I’ll tell you what kids, I wasn’t crazy about the rinse cycle
but the drying programme works like gangbusters.’

‘I’m going again. I’m going again!
Now where’d I leave the damn keys of this deathtrap?’

* Do not try this at home. Who needs mopping up two gallons of soapy water from the kitchen floor? That’s what neighbours’ kitchens are for.